Conceiving and developing characters is more taxing on a wrier than many realize.
To render a protagonist and her story believable—to create emotional verisimilitude—writers must be able to do the dance between objectivity and subjectivity.
To be objective, you must step outside the character to observe them from all angles, and from the inside and out to perform a kind of detached “reporting” to the reader.
To explain. To summarize. To tell.
To be subjective, you must climb inside the character and roam around through clandestine caverns of their heart, mind, and soul, to live in their skin and render them believable as a living, breathing human being who steps off the page and into readers’ hearts and minds.
To leave an impression. To invoke pathos. To show.
This process can be simultaneously harrowing and debilitating, fulfilling and transforming.
The emotional impact of being a writer is something many don’t discuss.
It’s something non-writers don’t or can’t comprehend. It’s something beginning writers don’t expect, which can become a great obstacle for many.
To write and tell universal stories that resonate in the hearts of your readers,
you must be willing to feel deeply.
So, it’s important to have self-care practices in place.
Use these tips to help you navigate the emotional experience of living a writing life.
Set Emotional Limits for Each Session
Decide in advance how deeply you’re willing to delve into intense scenes. Use timers or word count goals to create a natural stopping point before you feel emotionally drained.
Create a Transition Ritual
After writing challenging scenes and material, establish a ritual to transition out of that mindset. Light a candle, take a shower, or engage in a simple mindfulness exercise to signal closure for the day.
Check In with Yourself Regularly
Before and after writing sessions, pause to assess your emotional state. Jotting a few thoughts down in your writer’s notebook or using a simple rating system can help you track how your work is affecting you.
Balance Heavy Writing with Joyful Activities
Counterbalance the emotional weight of your work with activities that bring you joy—gardening, dancing, reading lighthearted books, or spending time with friends.
Maintain a Strong Support Network
Share your emotional responses to your writing with trusted friends, fellow writers, or a therapist. Talking through your emotional experiences can help you process them more effectively.
Physically Ground Yourself
Writing intense material can leave you feeling untethered. Engage in grounding activities like yoga, stretching, or walking barefoot outside to reconnect with your body.
Take Breaks Without Guilt
Step away when needed. Whether it’s an hour, a day, or a week, giving yourself space to rest and recharge is part of the creative process, not a failure to push through.
Separate Reality from Fiction
Remind yourself that your characters’ pain and struggles aren’t your own. Visualizing a metaphorical “door” you close after writing can help you leave the fictional world behind.
Curate a Self-Care Bundle
Have a “writer’s comfort kit” on hand for tough moments. Include soothing items like herbal tea, a favorite playlist, stress balls, candles, or inspirational quotes.
Seek Professional Guidance if Needed
Writing about trauma, taboo topics, or deeply personal emotions may bring up unexpected feelings. A therapist can provide tools to navigate these emotions healthily.
Viewing your writing as a full body experience, including your emotional body, will help you work through obstacles when you feel compelled to shy way from your practice due to fear of feeling deep emotions.
Let me know in the comments which practices you already use and if you try a new one.
As always… Sending you mad writing mojo…
Happy writing!